Everyone,

Happy 35th. I am humbled to be included in a list of people that were and are the Zoo. Ira has a wonderful 'eye' for talent... in my case I don't feel I ever was in the same league as the people that formally worked at the ZOO. I really admire what everyone did then and what everyone has gone on to do. It's an amazing group of people.

It certainly was an alignment of the planets that will most certainly never happen again in radio. Ira was 'big shoes' to fill and I know I never came close to filling them when given the chance. From Kenny's wry sense of humor to Mark Addy's and Bob Shannon's wonderful 'pipes' those were great days! And they paid us!

From Gary's inventions to Charlie's wonderful friendliness (if that's a word) think about all the great people that walked those halls! Even people seldom mentioned, like Randy Thomas (now one of the most well known female voice talents in the country - think Academy Awards), have moved on to greatness. Everybody remember Mike Taylor? John Dew, I never saw him frown or less than enthusiastic. What a great supporter for the Zoo! You couldn't have asked for someone with more nerve to support this wacky idea and group. People forget that Belo didn't even want us in their building. Especially after the TV show we did with "Shinola" Johnson. Can you imagine? We got away with murder.

So Howard Stein tells hoo-hoo jokes. I accidentally played at 7:50AM Monty Python's cheese bit on the air where John Cleese says, "....I don't care how FUCKING runny it is...." Jim Stansell, the manager at the time, stuck his head in the studio and said, "he didn't just say "fucking" did he?". "No", I said. That was it. Fortunately my morning show was so low rated, I think only my dog heard it.

Remember the Electric Ballroom? Peter Frampton? Jeez, Peter Frampton should STILL be mowing Ira's lawn to thank him! And Gary's mixes of Frampton - divine. (I actually have no memory of the Electric Ballroom myself past the first margarita on the first night).

I saw Jeff Poll one of the station managers that was fired over Arbitron diary questions years ago and snuck up on him; put my finger in his back and said, "ARB police." I thought he was gonna toss his cookies right there! (Jeez, the PD at the time - that everybody thought would never work in radio again - I think now runs Clear Channel programming???)

I remember Bob Shannon doing his show from a hospital bed. And I think we had the same bed delivered for Charlie Jones to do his show. I know these guys hated me for having 'em work while wounded, but that happens when you're the best (plus we were too cheap to pay part-timers to fill in). Charlie Kendall. More great pipes. Loretta, Michael Brown, John Rody and of course, John LaBella... all great guys.

Beverly Beasley, the guys in sales... this is like the list for WKRP, each one a personality! (I don't think Jamie Friar had tape around his office). The morning guy that had BO. The guy named Wayne that quit the day before we went on the air because he thought we weren't Top 40 enough (if it wasn't for him quitting I probably still be doing all-nights). Jon Dillon, still a legend. Mr. Jeffers, the wonderful engineer that actually cut vinyl master LPs on a Sennheiser cutting lathe where the studios ended up being built. He always made you tip-toe when he was cutting a master. Even he was walking lightly the day someone brought in 'magic' brownies and he had one. (We all thought he was having a heart attack - funny now, not then).

Unbeknownst to most of you, Ira and I would go down to the WFAA engineering equipment room and put EQ boost in our signal to fight the apparent loudness of KNUS which was next to us at 98.7. Then we'd run out into the parking lot to listen on as many radios as we could find to see if we were as loud at KNUS (we weren't). I think at one time we had so much compression in to fight KNUS that the meters never moved off 100 percent!

I remember one night some how the studio feeds got screwed up and WFAA-Talk570 AM was going out over our signal. I called the big control room downstairs at 10:01 PM and they said, "we'll get to it at 10:30. 10:30??? "Why 10:30?", I asked. "Because that's when the Channel 8 News is over...." Meanwhile the hotline is dang near burned out from Ira calling... so I call the transmitter and get "Smitty" the engineer out at Cedar Hill. I tell him of this emergency and hurridly explain that we want to run the "Emergency Tape" that they have at the transmitter and kill the misdirected feed he's getting from the studio. Long pause. In the background I hear him dial the on-air monitor at the transmitter from KSCS (to which he was listening) to KZEW. He comes back to the phone and says, "You're feeding me AM." As Homer Simpson would now say, "D'oh!" It took approximately 5 minutes for him to get the tape going... and then it was only on one channel AND it was in addition to the AM feed. You can imaging what it sounded like. So I call the transmitter back and "Smitty" answers the phone and I can hear KSCS playing in the background again. I tell him the situation and he says, "You have to kill the AM feed to the transmitter. Another lifetime goes by and I explain that I have no control over what is being fed to him. He says, "Why not?" I said, "BECAUSE LORETTA WAS PLAYING WITH THE ROUTER THAT CONTROLS THE STUDIO-TRANSMITTER FEEDS AND NO ONE KNOWS HOW THEY WORK - YOU FUCKING IDIOT!" Not my best move. He hung up on me but did finally kill the feed from the studio. It took the better part of an hour to reroute the studio-transmitter feeds and get them straight. And another hour to convince "Smitty" to restore the signal from the studio.

So Jon Dillon comes in after me and on the air during our handover at 2AM says, "so I hear the guy at the transmitter is an idiot (or something to that effect)." Hotline rings. I'm expecting Ira, but it's "Smitty" at the transmitter. NOW he's decided to monitor KZEW, hears the comment and threatens to "come down there and kill you both". I think I skipped my production that night and went straight home. Jon still looks over his shoulder. Next day I asked our chief engineer about "Smitty" and whether we had anything to fear. The chief engineer said, "Hell yes! Why do you think they sent out to work by himself at the transmitter?!!"

How many of you put on Alice's Restaurant so you could buzz the parking lot or take a nice easy 'constitutional' break only to have some one from WFAA-TV flip the AM-FM switch in the john to WFAA 570?

Remember Zoo World? The first one I was in charge of, the Dallas Police Tactical Squad shut down in 10 minutes at about 8 o'clock at night. 4,000 people one minute... one guy left getting his head bashed by billyclubs beside a shiny new light blue Chevrolet Malibu the next. Oh the humanity...or lack there of. (Try explaining to your boss where 4-5 thousand people went while he ducked out to grab a bite of dinner. General Manager Ivan Braiker to Mark, "they can't ALL be in the restroom!" ) Thank god Belo owned the newspaper or we'd been front page center - above the fold.

I remember a New Year's Eve remote we picked up from KSAN in San Francisco. Ira called on the hotline and said, "Did that guy in San Francisco just say,'there was a couple fucking on stage'?" My answer, "I don't think so". If we'd had a video signal along with what went out on the air Janet Jackson would be auditioning.

By the way, I always found answering, "I don't think so." worked in just about any situation with Belo. Especailly when I got in over my head in management. Ward Huey and Mike "Let Me Speak To The Manager" Shapiro always wondered who the hippie in parking space #7 was.... Even when I started wearing Sans-A-Belts and wearing a tie I didn't fit in.

Sorry to those I probably blamed for my shortcomings. Hey this is starting to sound like step number 7 or 8??? I sure hope the statute of limitations has run out on all the crap we did. At least antibiotics got rid of most of my problems and anti-depressants are starting to make a dent in my sucky personality.

To all you guys that made me look great, I thank you. It's the people you step on to get to where you... oh screw it, this ain't the Oscars.... cue Randy.

Thank god we didn't know what we had or we'd be still thinking about it 35 years later! Oh, wait......

Mark Christopher Underkofler (Mr. Tempie Lindsey as I'm now known)